Getting along with parents

Getting along with parents
I wish I had better parents.

Every family has its own set of circumstances and problems that only its members can fully understand. You may wonder why you were born into your family. Or why your parents aren't as kind as others. Or why you are not blessed with a more beautiful home and a more loving and supportive family. You may even want to leave home. One thing I can say, however, is that no matter what kind of people your parents are, they are your parents. If you did not have them, you would not be alive. Please understand the deep significance of this point. You were born to this particular family in this particular place on this planet Earth at this particular time. You were not born into any other family. This fact encompasses the meaning of everything.

Buddhism explains that nothing happens by chance and that people already possess within them all they need to be happy. Therefore, there is no treasure more precious than life itself. No matter how difficult your situation, no matter how much you feel ignored by your parents, you are alive now - still young and blessed with a youthful spirit with which you can construct the happiest of lives from this moment forward. Do not destroy or harm your precious future by giving way to despair today.

Courageously spur yourself on, reminding yourself the deeper pain and grief, the greater the happiness that awaits you. Have the determination to become a pillar of support for your family. Buddhism teaches this way of life. Whether you have a parent suffering from alcoholism or a serious illness, whether your family is experience difficult times because of parent's failed business, whether you have endure the pain of seeing a parent criticized and attacked even falsely, or whether you are abandoned by a parent - all of these seemingly adverse situations can be viewed as nourishment to make you grow even stronger.

Regardless of how you are treated by your parents, ultimately, it is your responsibility, not theirs, that you become happy. It is up to each of us to have the determination to become the "sun" that can dispell all the darkness in our lives and within our families. Nichiren Buddhists know that this resolve can be fortified by chanting Nam myoho renge kyo each morning and evening.

No matter what happens, it is vital that you live confidently with the conviction that you are the "sun". Of course, in life there are sunny days and cloudy days. But even on cloudy days, the sun is still shinning. Even if we are still suffering, it is vital that we strive to keep the sun shinning brightly in our hearts.

One young person I know has no father, his mother is incapacitated by serious health problems, and his older sister is in the hospital. While enduring so many hardships in youth, he has already scaled a high mountain in life, well ahead of others. I believe that young people who confront such hardships will be the leaders of the twenty-first century.

The Way Of Youth - pg 8
SGI President
Daisaku Ikeda


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