Friday, December 30, 2016
ONLY THE ENGLISH COULD HAVE INVENTED THIS LANGUAGE
ONLY THE ENGLISH COULD HAVE INVENTED THIS LANGUAGE
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Then shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!
Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England ..
We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends
and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English
should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
in which your house can burn up as it burns
down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out,
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?
I WOULD LIKE TO ADD THAT IF PEOPLE FROM POLAND ARE CALLED POLES THEN
PEOPLE FROM HOLLAND SHOULD BE HOLES AND THE GERMANS GERMS!!!
Sent from my iPhone
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Then shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!
Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England ..
We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends
and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English
should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
in which your house can burn up as it burns
down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out,
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?
I WOULD LIKE TO ADD THAT IF PEOPLE FROM POLAND ARE CALLED POLES THEN
PEOPLE FROM HOLLAND SHOULD BE HOLES AND THE GERMANS GERMS!!!
Sent from my iPhone
Thursday, December 29, 2016
Beautiful message by Pope Francis which says it all.
BEING HAPPY
by Pope Francis
"You may have defects, be anxious and sometimes live irritated, but do not forget that your life is the greatest enterprise in the world. Only you can prevent it from going into decadence. There are many that need you, admire you and love you.
I would like to remind you that being happy is not having a sky without storms, or roads without accidents, or work without fatigue, or relationships without disappointments.
Being happy is finding strength in forgiveness, hope in one's battles, security at the stage of fear, love in disagreements.
Being happy is not only to treasure the smile, but that you also reflect on the sadness.
It is not just commemorating the event, but also learning lessons in failures.
It is not just having joy with the applause, but also having joy in anonymity.
Being happy is to recognize that it is worthwhile to live, despite all the challenges, misunderstandings and times of crises.
Being happy is not inevitable fate, but a victory for those who can travel towards it with your own being.
Being happy is to stop being a victim of problems but become an actor in history itself.
It is not only to cross the deserts outside of ourselves, but still more, to be able to find an oasis in the recesses of our soul.
It is to thank God every morning for the miracle of life.
Being happy is not being afraid of one's feelings. It is to know how to talk about ourselves. It is to bear with courage when hearing a "no".
It is to have the security to receive criticism, even if is unfair.
It is to kiss the children, pamper the parents, have poetic moments with friends, even if they have hurt us.
Being happy means allowing the free, happy and simple child inside each of us to live; having the maturity to say, "I was wrong"; having the audacity to say, "forgive me".
It is to have sensitivity in expressing, "I need you"; to have the ability of saying, "I love you."
So that your life becomes a garden full of opportunities for being happy...
In your spring-time, may you become a lover of joy. In your winter, may you become a friend of wisdom.
And when you go wrong along the way, you start all over again. Thus you will be more passionate about life.
And you will find that happiness is not about having a perfect life but about using tears to water tolerance, losses to refine patience, failures to carve serenity, pain to lapidate pleasure, obstacles to open the windows of intelligence.
Never give up .... Never give up on the people you love. Never give up from being happy because life is an incredible show.
And you are a special human being!"
- Pope Francis -
Blessed 2017 New Year
Sent from my iPhone
BEING HAPPY
by Pope Francis
"You may have defects, be anxious and sometimes live irritated, but do not forget that your life is the greatest enterprise in the world. Only you can prevent it from going into decadence. There are many that need you, admire you and love you.
I would like to remind you that being happy is not having a sky without storms, or roads without accidents, or work without fatigue, or relationships without disappointments.
Being happy is finding strength in forgiveness, hope in one's battles, security at the stage of fear, love in disagreements.
Being happy is not only to treasure the smile, but that you also reflect on the sadness.
It is not just commemorating the event, but also learning lessons in failures.
It is not just having joy with the applause, but also having joy in anonymity.
Being happy is to recognize that it is worthwhile to live, despite all the challenges, misunderstandings and times of crises.
Being happy is not inevitable fate, but a victory for those who can travel towards it with your own being.
Being happy is to stop being a victim of problems but become an actor in history itself.
It is not only to cross the deserts outside of ourselves, but still more, to be able to find an oasis in the recesses of our soul.
It is to thank God every morning for the miracle of life.
Being happy is not being afraid of one's feelings. It is to know how to talk about ourselves. It is to bear with courage when hearing a "no".
It is to have the security to receive criticism, even if is unfair.
It is to kiss the children, pamper the parents, have poetic moments with friends, even if they have hurt us.
Being happy means allowing the free, happy and simple child inside each of us to live; having the maturity to say, "I was wrong"; having the audacity to say, "forgive me".
It is to have sensitivity in expressing, "I need you"; to have the ability of saying, "I love you."
So that your life becomes a garden full of opportunities for being happy...
In your spring-time, may you become a lover of joy. In your winter, may you become a friend of wisdom.
And when you go wrong along the way, you start all over again. Thus you will be more passionate about life.
And you will find that happiness is not about having a perfect life but about using tears to water tolerance, losses to refine patience, failures to carve serenity, pain to lapidate pleasure, obstacles to open the windows of intelligence.
Never give up .... Never give up on the people you love. Never give up from being happy because life is an incredible show.
And you are a special human being!"
- Pope Francis -
Blessed 2017 New Year
Sent from my iPhone
Wednesday, December 28, 2016
Chinese is so difficult to learn... with multiple meanings to the same words
Chinese is so difficult to learn." 就这四个中文字来说
"大不一样"
一美女兴致勃勃地问医生："我想丰胸，但是丰胸后会有什么效果？"
医生淡定地答道：丰胸后，一般会有四种结果：
1. 大不一样；
2. 不大一样；
3. 一样不大；
4. 不一样大！
世界上没有其它的文字能够有这样的功能，中文万岁！
中文字的奥妙
外国人学中文，确实不容易。中文字的奥妙，常常让学中文的老外晕倒，分享几个段子：
一、方便
一位刚学过一点中文的美国人来到中国，中国朋友请他吃饭。
到了饭店落座，中国朋友说："对不起，我去方便一下。"
那老外没明白，"方便"是哪里？
见老外疑惑，中国朋友告诉他说"方便"，口语里是"上厕所"的意思。
哦，老外意会了。
席间，中国朋友对老外说："我下次到美国，希望你能帮忙提供些方便。"
老外纳闷了：他去美国，让我提供些厕所干嘛？
道别时，另一位在座的中国朋友热情地对老外说："我想在你方便的时候请你吃饭。"
见老外吃惊发愣，中国朋友接着说："如果你最近不方便的话，咱们改日……"
老外无语。
"咱找个你我都方便的时候一起吃饭吧。"
老外随即晕倒。
二、乳
一位老师向老外学生解释"乳" 字的含意：乳即是小的意思，比如乳鸽、乳猪等。
讲解完，老师要求老外学生用"乳"字造句。
老外学生造句说："现在房价太高了，所以我家只能买得起20平方米的乳房。"
老师听了，冒着冷汗说："再造一个！"
老外学生："我年纪太小，连一米宽的乳沟都跳不过去。"
老师冷汗如雨下，说："再造一个！"
老外学生说："老师我真的想不出来了，我的乳头都快想破了！"
三、意思
某老外苦学汉语10年，到中国参加汉语考试。
试题之一：
请解释下文中每个"意思"的意思：
阿呆给领导送红包时，两个人的对话颇有意思。
领导："你这是什么意思？"
阿呆："没什么意思，意思意思而已。"
领导："你这就不够意思了。"
阿呆："小意思，小意思。"
领导："你这人真有意思。"
阿呆："其实也没有别的意思。"
领导："那我就不好意思了。"
阿呆："是我不好意思。"
这老外给中国华文弄晕了，一头雾水。
中文的"意思"太深奥了，于是他交白卷回国。
如果你笑了，记得转发到朋友圈，让朋友们一起欢乐喔
Sent from my iPhone
"大不一样"
一美女兴致勃勃地问医生："我想丰胸，但是丰胸后会有什么效果？"
医生淡定地答道：丰胸后，一般会有四种结果：
1. 大不一样；
2. 不大一样；
3. 一样不大；
4. 不一样大！
世界上没有其它的文字能够有这样的功能，中文万岁！
中文字的奥妙
外国人学中文，确实不容易。中文字的奥妙，常常让学中文的老外晕倒，分享几个段子：
一、方便
一位刚学过一点中文的美国人来到中国，中国朋友请他吃饭。
到了饭店落座，中国朋友说："对不起，我去方便一下。"
那老外没明白，"方便"是哪里？
见老外疑惑，中国朋友告诉他说"方便"，口语里是"上厕所"的意思。
哦，老外意会了。
席间，中国朋友对老外说："我下次到美国，希望你能帮忙提供些方便。"
老外纳闷了：他去美国，让我提供些厕所干嘛？
道别时，另一位在座的中国朋友热情地对老外说："我想在你方便的时候请你吃饭。"
见老外吃惊发愣，中国朋友接着说："如果你最近不方便的话，咱们改日……"
老外无语。
"咱找个你我都方便的时候一起吃饭吧。"
老外随即晕倒。
二、乳
一位老师向老外学生解释"乳" 字的含意：乳即是小的意思，比如乳鸽、乳猪等。
讲解完，老师要求老外学生用"乳"字造句。
老外学生造句说："现在房价太高了，所以我家只能买得起20平方米的乳房。"
老师听了，冒着冷汗说："再造一个！"
老外学生："我年纪太小，连一米宽的乳沟都跳不过去。"
老师冷汗如雨下，说："再造一个！"
老外学生说："老师我真的想不出来了，我的乳头都快想破了！"
三、意思
某老外苦学汉语10年，到中国参加汉语考试。
试题之一：
请解释下文中每个"意思"的意思：
阿呆给领导送红包时，两个人的对话颇有意思。
领导："你这是什么意思？"
阿呆："没什么意思，意思意思而已。"
领导："你这就不够意思了。"
阿呆："小意思，小意思。"
领导："你这人真有意思。"
阿呆："其实也没有别的意思。"
领导："那我就不好意思了。"
阿呆："是我不好意思。"
这老外给中国华文弄晕了，一头雾水。
中文的"意思"太深奥了，于是他交白卷回国。
如果你笑了，记得转发到朋友圈，让朋友们一起欢乐喔
Sent from my iPhone
"Can do" proverbs
*Chinese Proverb:-*
If one can do
I will do
If no one can do
I will do.
*Malay Proverb:-*
If one can do
I need not do
If no one can do
I also cannot do
*Japanese Proverb:*
If One Can Do,
You Can Do.
If No one Can Do,
You Must Do.
*Indian Proverb:-*
If One Can Do,
Let Him Do.
If No one can Do
What can I Do?
😂😂😂
Sent from my iPhone
If one can do
I will do
If no one can do
I will do.
*Malay Proverb:-*
If one can do
I need not do
If no one can do
I also cannot do
*Japanese Proverb:*
If One Can Do,
You Can Do.
If No one Can Do,
You Must Do.
*Indian Proverb:-*
If One Can Do,
Let Him Do.
If No one can Do
What can I Do?
😂😂😂
Sent from my iPhone
Monday, December 26, 2016
Friday, December 16, 2016
Monday, December 5, 2016
Sunday, December 4, 2016
Saturday, December 3, 2016
Living dolls, bloodlust, scent from heaven
Living Dolls: The Subculture of Doll Collecting
Most children lose interest in dolls as they grow older. The eccentric characters that populate the wildly entertaining documentary Living Dolls are different. There's Mike, an adult male who lives with his parents, his boyfriend and a sizeable collection...
Bloodlust: Tournament of Death
In the seemingly benign state of Delaware lies a brutally violent underworld. It's led by professional wrestlers with a penchant for bloodshed, including their own. Freed from the restrictions imposed by mainstream wrestling, their theatrics aren't confined to their...
Scent from Heaven
Can a fragrance drive men to murder? In the case of Oud, it can and often does. A precious scent derived from a species of tree which is currently teetering on the verge of extinction, Oud is one of...
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Minden NV 89423
USA
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